Is it time?
by Paige Joy
Summary: It's a year after Sara Sidle left Las Vegas and Grissom's heart is failing him. Will this be the reason Sara crashes? Or, will Gil Grissom move to Frisco to be with his beloved? I do not own CSI. Rating M to be safe. ON HIATUS!
1. Chapter 1

**_Disclaimer: I do not own CSI or the characters used, the big boys at CBS do.  
Dr. Will Denvey is very much mine._**

Summery: It's a year after Sara left Vegas, and Grissom's heart is starting to fail him. Sara's already too fragile. Will this be the reason she finally crashes, or will Grissom move to Frisco to be with her?

**_A/N: This idea just came to me, so I decided to write it. Depending on the interest I get with the first three chapters, I'll decide if I'm going to carry on with it or not.  
I don't know where I'm going with this, but, I'm hoping it's going to be based around GSR.__Please let me know what you think.  
Enjoy.  
Take care.  
Paige  


* * *

  
Chapter One_**

Grissom lay on the hard hospital for the third time in two months. The doctor said it was nothing, just his age finally catching up on him. Or, rather that's what he said until today.

"Dr. Grissom. I'm afraid to have to tell you this, but, your heart is getting weaker. It seems that your latest burst of illness effected had put too much strain on it. The long hours and stress at work also seem to be putting a large amount of stress on it." Dr. Will Denvey was a short, rather plump man. His hair was starting to grey and his eyes were slowly sinking into his skull. His pure white coat shone bright against his black and grey clothing.

Grissom simply nodded at his news and asked, "When can I go home?"

"You can go now Dr. Grissom. But, you need to start taking care of yourself more. If you start to feel pain, rest. If it gets too bad, have someone drive you in and I'll see to you straight away. I advice you to tell your friends, family and colleges."

"Thanks Doctor." Grissom stood and promptly left.

_'__Oh, God. What is Sara isn't ready to hear still needs time. What about the others? What are they going to say? '_

Grissom looked down at his wrist watch.

_'__I'm going to be late for work.'_

_******  
_

Sara sat on the floor of the beach house living room, sketching the beautiful love of her life, from a photo that was taken during a conference in New York. She missed him with all her heart, but she just couldn't go back. Not yet. She wasn't ready to face the questions that her family would shot at her. To stare back into the face of death every day and escape it's hold.

_'__God I hope he's okay. I haven't spoken to him in weeks.'_

Sara was now teaching entomology at the local university. She'd been in San Fransisco for a year now. She'd seen her fair share of death, but to hear her mother killed herself the day before her trail really did knock Sara over the edge. She needed Grissom more than ever now.

_'__That's it. Once I've finished this, I'm calling him. That gives him time to come off shift.'_


	2. Chapter 2

_**A/N: Thanks to everyone that is reading along and that had left a review. It's much appreciated. Here's chapter two. Please continue to give your support and thoughts. Thanks.  
Enjoy and take care.  
Paige  
****

* * *

  
Chapter Two**_

Catherine sat in her office, starring down at the pile of paperwork she had yet to complete. After Grissom feel ill, Catherine had been covering him. Between being out in the field, helping the guys out and looking after Lindsey, she just hadn't found the time to do it and run it up to Ecklie.

_**'**__God, now I know why Gil hated doing it so much.'_

Warrick, Nick and Greg were chatting away in the break room about the good old days, when all six of them would go out after a hard shift and drown their sorrows. Having a laugh and a joke. Each of them chuckled when they thought back to the day when Sara and Grissom were caught having a personal moment in his office when they found Nick alive, and then again when the Warrick was told he was going to live. Her infamous Sidle smile was still fresh in their minds. It was the day that she left, and everyone on the night shift was starting to wallow in sorrow._**  
**_

"I miss the talks we had, ya know man." Nick often spoke to Sara when he felt he couldn't find the answers to his problems, or when he needed a shoulder to cry on after he was buried alive.

"I know what ya mean. She was always their for us, but, come to think of it, I never asked her if she was okay." Warrick was now happily living with Catherine and Lindsey. He too used to speak to Sara on a regular basis. When his marriage failed, she was there for him. He could speak to her about anything, no questions asked. They all could.

"Yeah. She was always there at the right time. She always seemed so happy." While Greg had only spoken to Sara about girl trouble, the pair used to go out to clubs. Often the same nights that they all went out together. He also had a crush on Sara, she knew of course, but she never let it get in her way when she was there for him. "What about Cath? Did she ever speak to Sara like we did?"

All eyes shot to Warrick. It wasn't a secret about him and Catherine, he just had to work under Grissom instead of his lover.

"Yeah. I think so. But you'd have to ask her." Warrick dropped his eyes to the floor, knowing very well that Catherine had spoken to Sara, on many occasions before she left. But, what she spoke about was a secret.


	3. Chapter 3

**_A/N: second chapter of the day. It's only short, but there is a lot more to come. The more reviews I receive the more I'll post. Thanks for everyones support!  
Enjoy and take care.  
Paige_  


* * *

  
Chapter Three**

It was coming to the end of shift and Grissom needed to tell everyone about what the doctor had said. He needed to cut down his work load, but he couldn't do it without the others thinking that he wasn't himself. And that was the truth. Gil Grissom had always been a private man, keeping himself to himself.

Grissom sat in the break room, waiting for the rest of his team to return from their crime scenes. He had finished his hours ago. A petti theft. Case closed. Easy.

The others, well, Warrick, Catherine and Nick had a double at the Palms and Greg had a missing person.

The rest of the gang arrived at the same time, more or less, and met outside the main doors.

"Hey guys, took you long enough." Greg and Nick were sat on the concrete steps that led up to Las Vegas Crime Lab (LVCL), wide smiles plastered on their faces.

Catherine, Warrick and Jim Brass trotted up the stairs, their hands full of evidence.

"Do shut up and help take this lot in." Catherine threw the boys in of her 'death' looks and continued towards the building, leaving the blokes to catch up with her.

After locking the evidence up in the volt, the gang headed over to the break room for coffee. Only to find Grissom slouched in one of the chairs.


	4. Chapter 4

_**A/N: I'm thinking about stopping this story. So, please be kind and leave a review. It's you guys that are reading this that decide how long it goes on for, and what happens. So, any suggestions are welcome. You can either leave a review, or visit my profile and e-mail me your thoughts and suggestions. Thanks to everyone that is reading along!  
Take care and enjoy!  
****

* * *

  
Chapter Four**_

Sara was now lay in the bedroom, cell phone in hand, waiting for her alarm to go off, indicating end of night shift.

Her cell wallpaper and screen saver was Grissom. Her one and only. Those bright blues still captivated her attention. Every time she took out her cell, she would looked straight at him and smile to herself, knowing that even though he was in Vegas, he was always with her. It sounds silly, I know, but she felt as though he was watching over her, constantly loving her.

Sara lost herself in the memories and daydreams of Gilbert A. Grissom. It wasn't too long before her alarm twinkled through the room.

_**'**__Time for me to phone Gil!'_

Sara perked right up. She couldn't let Grissom know that she was beginning to crack. Not now.

She had been keeping in-touch with Catherine ever since her second departure. She had been told all the gossip of the lab. All the messages that the guys had told her pass on, and she knew very well, that Grissom wasn't himself. She thought he'd got over the thought of losing her when they both stayed at the beach house and he confessed everything to her. But, he was worse than ever and needed her, just as much as she needed him.

"Grissom." Grissom was lay on his couch, nursing a migraine when the call came._**  
**_

"Hey, Gil." Sara smiled on hearing his voice after what felt like forever. "I've missed you."

"I've missed you too, cherry blossom." That had been Sara's pet name ever since he called it her that night in Frisco. He saw how it sent shivers down her spine when he called it her.

"How have you been, Gil?"

"Better. You?"

"I'm fine. I've been speaking to Catherine, she said you were in hospital again..."

"I was. "

"Gilbert, what's wrong?"

"I'm fine Sara."

"No. You're not. I can tell. Don't make me have to come over their Gilbert A. Grissom, 'cause believe you me, I will if it means getting the truth."

"I could say the same about you Sara Sidle." The other end of the line went quiet. "Hunni? You still there?"_**  
**_

"Yeah. Listen, Gil, I need you, more than ever. I don't care if I have to come to Vegas to be with you, but, I'd prefer it if you come down here. You could rest. Away from the stress of work."

"You still at the beach house?"

"Yup. I couldn't bring myself to leave it behind." Sara crossed her fingers in her lap.

"I'll be there tomorrow. "

"Don't you need to speak to Catherine and Ecklie, first?"

"I'll call them whenever we finish." Grissom smiled. He loved his conversations with Sara after shift.

They hadn't spoken in a few weeks and they had a lot to catch up on.

Sara and Grissom stayed on the phone for hours, talking to each other, they even had a meal 'together'.But, neither of them told the other what it was that they were keeping such a secret.

******

Catherine scrabbled for the ringing cell that lay on the bedside table. "Willows... Hey Griss... Yeah sure... Why... Oh, okay... Have a good time. I'll see you when you get back... Oh. And send her our love... Thanks Gil... G'night."

"Where's Gil going?" Warrick lay on his side, his head resting on his hand.

"To see Sara. He doesn't know how long he's going to be gone, so he's put me in charge of night shift."

"Doesn't that mean more paperwork?" Warrick giggled to himself. Catherine hated paperwork.

"Yes." Catherine pouted as she lay down and snuggled up close to Warrick.

******

Ecklie was still at the lab when he received the call from Grissom. "Ecklie... Gil... Of course... Willows?! Why her... Fine... Take as long as you want... But, you've got to let me know roughly when you're coming back... Bye Gil."

Ecklie wasn't the slightest bit impressed that Gil Grissom had suddenly decided to leave for San Fransisco.

_**'**__What did he mean he 'might not be coming back'?'  


* * *

_

**A/N: Here's a question for you guys to answer... What do you want Grissom to do? Leave Vegas for good, or bring Sara back with him? Or is there something else you want Griss to do?  
Let me know your thoughts.  
Hope you enjoyed it!  
Take care  
Paige**


	5. Chapter 5

**_A/N: Thanks to all the wonderful reviews and suggestions! They're priceless. Enjoy chapter five and please continue to leave me your thoughts.  
Take care and enjoy!_  


* * *

  
Chapter Five**

Grissom sat on his flight to Frisco, flipping through one of Sara's folders she had left behind for him. It was full of the sketches she did when they were together on their days off. Most of them were the two of them together, sat on the couch snuggling close, or lay in bed together. Grissom inwardly smiled as he remembered the face that she pulled when she was concentrating. Many of the pages were growing tatty edges from the many times he had looked through them when he couldn't sleep. He had fallen into his old habits again. Sara had worked so hard with him, and now he had to break them on his own, just so he could stay well for his beloved Sara.

******

Sara sat in her office flipping through the many papers that had been handed to her at the end of her previous class. She couldn't concentrate. She just kept looking up at the photos on her desk, of the guys from the lab, and of her and Grissom.

Half an hour later, Sara was still failing with her marking, so, she decided to dump them in her bag, and head home. She had taught her last class for the day and hour ago, she was free to leave. Even on the way home, her mind wondered to Grissom and the passionate nights they spent together. But, just as she'd start to smile and giggle to herself, thoughts of her mother would come crashing into her mind, invading the little part of Sara that was left untouched.

When Sara arrived home fifteen minutes later, she Jumped out of her car and headed straight for the kitchen, but the phone rang before she even had time to set her purse down on the counter.

* * *

_**A/N: So, who do think is calling Sara? And why are they calling?  
Please leave me your thoughts.  
Hope you enjoyed it!  
Take care.  
Paige**_


	6. Chapter 6

_**A/N: Thanks to everyone that has continued to read and leave me their thoughts! I'm so greatful!!  
This chapter is slightly longer than the previous one. After this chapter, most of the remaining ones are going to be GSR, but, that all depends on what you guys out there want to do with Catherine and Warrick.  
Enjoy.  
****

* * *

  
Chapter six**_

Catherine and Warrick were sat at the dinning table, both nursing a mug of coffee.

"So, why on earth would Gil be going to Frisco?" Warrick asked as he took a sip from his mug.

"Sara's there." Catherine hadn't touched her coffee and instead was starring straight at Warrick, wanting to get this conversation over and done with as quick as possible.

"Something has to be wrong for Gil to be going over. Anyway, how do you know where Sara is?"_  
_

_'He's so gonna kill me for keeping this from him.'_

"I've been keeping in-touch. Sara asked me not to tell any of you where she was or that she wasn't a CSI any more." Catherine bowed her head at the glare Warrick shot across the table.

"So, do you know what's caused Gil to go over to her?"

"No. She was slightly pissed off when she called me last, but, I haven't spoken to her for a few weeks now."

"I'm going to take a leap and say that from the way Gil's been acting, neither has he."

"That is, until today. But, it'll be good for him to get away for a while, you know he's been ill a lot lately."

"Yeah." He sighed as he stood and headed for the kitchen.

Catherine left her mug on the table and followed. Wrapping her arms around his waist from behind, she lent her head on his shoulder and whispered "I would have told you if she wanted me to. I love you 'Rick."

Warrick turned round to face his lover. "I love you too. It's just... I worry about her."

Catherine placed her palms flat on Warrick's chest and looked lovingly up to him. "I know, I do too."

Standing on tip-toe, Catherine leaned in for a kiss, reassuring Warrick of her love. Warrick was only too happy to respond to her touch. Silently letting Catherine know that she will always be his one and only.  


* * *

_**A/N: So, what do you want to happen to Catherine and Warrick? Do you want the rest of the team to show up at some point, if so how and where to do want them?  
Any suggestions on GSR are more than welcome. Please feel free to leave a review or visit my profile and send me an e-mail.  
Thanks and take care.  
Paige**_


	7. Chapter 7

_**A/N: Here we go, chapter seven! A little later than planned, but I had to write a history essay *moan*. So, thanks to ALL of you that are continuing to read and leave your thoughts. They are much appreciated.  
Enjoy!  
****

* * *

Chapter Seven**_

"Sidle."

"Sara. It's Gil."

"Hey Gil. How are you?"

"I'm fine. How about you?"

"I'm fine too." Sara smiled and let out a small giggle. "Are you at work?"

"Nope."

"Where are you then, 'cause this isn't your house number?"

"At the airport in Frisco." Grissom grinned to himself as he heard Sara sigh.

"I'll come and get you."

"Okay. Oh, and Sara?"

"Yes Gilbert?"

"I love you."

"I love you too Gil." Sara flipped her cell shut, scooped her keys and purse of the kitchen counter and practically jogged to her SUV.

When Sara left Vegas, she had decided that instead of having a 'normal' car, she would go for the SUV that she was used to. She thought that maybe, one day, she would go back into the field. She had even hoped at times that Grissom would call her and request her assistance on a case. They often spoke about his cases and her teaching, each helping the other out. Grissom never would go into detail of what he was working on though.

******

"Gil!" Sara waved over to Grissom who was standing on the other side of the road.

Grissom walked over, placed his back on the floor he brought Sara into his embrace, kissing her cheek when she pulled apart. "I've missed you."

"I've missed you too Gil." Sara kissed Grissom square on the lips, picked up his case and put it on the back seat before climbing into passenger seat. She remembered about Grissom not being a very good passenger. But, when he told her to drive, she didn't object.

As Sara slid into the drivers seat, Grissom grabbed her hand. "Get in Bugman." She flashed her infamous Sidle smile before shutting the door.

Not much was said on the journey to the beach house. Grissom just sat and starred at the beauty in front of him, while Sara concentrated more on keeping herself from stopping the car and jumping on the gorgeous genius she was next to, than on the road.

About ten minutes into the journey Grissom's hand had found it's way to Sara's thigh, soon after Sara's hand it's way to sit into of the hand that lay in her inner thigh.

"I love you Sar." Grissom was struggling to control his arousal, without feeling Sara's touch.

"I love you too Gil." Sara looked briefly over to her lover, nearly losing control of herself._**  
**_

Grissom loved the way his given name sounded when Sara said it. He smiled and turned his hand over so he could hold her hand. Oh how he could wait to get Sara to bed that night.

_'Slow down cowboy. Doc gave you strict instructions not to stress out your old ticker too much. Great! There goes my plan!'_

Grissom's face turned almost into a frown when he thought about not making love to Sara.

Sara saw Grissom look down at his feet. Her hand brushed his arousal as she placed her hand on his thigh. "We're here, Gil."

Grissom looked up. Nothing had changed, at lease, not on the outside.

Sara jumped out the SUV and headed for the door, finding the right key as she walked (well, almost jogged) to the door. The tears were threatening to fall.

_'Do I tell Gil now, or wait until he sees me breaking down?'__**  
**_

Grissom followed Sara after grabbing his case from the back seats. He nodded to Sara who had looked over her shoulder and locked the car.

_'When do I tell her about my heart? Now, or when I refuse to make love to her? God, I hope I don't have to refuse her.'  


* * *

**A/N: Thanks for reading!! So, when, where and how do you want Sara to tell Grissom her secret? And when, where and how do you want Grissom to tell Sara about his heart?  
Please let me know what you think and please, feel free to send me an e-mail/private message via my profile.  
Hope you enjoyed this chapter and Take care.  
Paige**_

_**  
**_


	8. Chapter 8

**_A/N: I'm sorry for posting this chapter a couple of days late, I've had writers block.  
Thanks to those that have continued to read and leave their thoughts. I am most greatful. So here's chapter eight.  
Enjoy and take care._  
****

* * *

  
Chapter eight**

Sara collapsed onto the floor of the shower. Grissom stood just outside the door, listening to his lovers sobs echo through the room. Stripping down, Grissom joined Sara in the shower, scooping her up in his arms as he held her under the boiling water as she cried.

She didn't even register that Grissom was there until she felt herself being lay on the bed. Once she heard Grissom leave the room she curled up into a ball and pulled the sheets tight around her shaking body.

Grissom brewed two mugs of coffee, and headed to the bedroom.

"Sara. Honey. " Grissom placed the mugs on one of the bedside table and sat himself on the edge of the bed, next to Sara.

"Gil?" Sara turned over and attempted to pull herself up right, but was stopped by Grissom her pushed her back down on the bed and lay next to her.

"Yes?" Grissom pulled Sara into his arms.  
Sara rested her head on Grissom's chest and listened to his heart. It didn't sound like it used to. "What are you doing here?"

"I want to be with you Sara. And if you don't want to go back to Vegas, then I'll move here."_**  
**_

"You'll leave the lab?"

"If it means being with you, then yes."

"Gil, it's your life. You've worked so hard to make it what it is. You can't just leave it for me." Sara sat up, but Grissom stayed laying still. "Why Gil? What made you come to me?"

"You said that you needed me more than ever, and that if you had to come to Vegas you would. I didn't want you to come back to have to run again." Grissom sat himself up. He hoped Sara would curl herself up in his arms, but instead, she crossed her arms over her chest and looked over at the gorgeous bloke next to her.

"I also said that I would go to Vegas to get the truth about your illness from you."

Grissom bowed his head. He knew she was right.

_'I have to tell her. But not now. I need time.'_

"Sara, I..." Grissom felt his chest tighten as he tried to move closer to his beloved.

"Gil. Are you alright?" Sara scuttled closer to Grissom, her eyes filling with concern and panic.

"In my bag. Pills." Grissom was getting short of breath.

___'Please hurry Sara.'  


* * *

**A/N: What happens to Gil? Do you think he will tell her about his heart or will she figure it out herself? will Sara spill the beans about what's on her mind, or does she forget about herself to care for Grissom? You decide!  
Please leave me your thoughts, and feel free to leave me an e-mail.  
Take care.  
Paige**  
_


	9. Chapter 9

_**A/N: Thanks to everyone for your support. Your reviews and thoughts are very much appreciated. I hope to hear from many of you again after this chapter. I love to read what you think!  
Enjoy. ****

* * *

  
Chapter nine**_

"Thanks hunni." Grissom slid himself to the edge of the bed after having his medication. Sara stood in front of him, arms once again crossed. Grissom looked up at her and sighed.

"Gil?"

"Sara please. Not now." Grissom put the glass on the bedside table and stood up.

"Then when, Gil? I need to know Gilbert." Sara took a step away from Grissom. Fear filled her eyes._**  
**_

_'Great! I've hurt her again. Nice going Gil!'  
___

"Gil?" Sara's voice was filled with concern, but her eyes soon filled with fear and anger.

"I only found out today Sara. Please, I haven't got the energy to argue."

"I'm not stupid Gil! I know what those are for!" Sara pointed to the pill bottle she had left on the bed side table. "Why Gil? Why didn't you just tell me. I would have come back to Vegas." Sara lowered her voice and went to hold Grissom's hand, but he pulled away and went to the bathroom.

_'Nice on Sara. Now look what you've done.'__**  
**_

In the bathroom, Gil sat with his back against the tub, tears streaming down his cheeks. He knew he should tell Sara. He had no right to keep the truth from her. He needed to calm down. His pulse was racing once more, not with happiness but with sadness and anger.

"She looked so scared. I'm scared. If I'd pulled myself from behind that damn microscope sooner, then I wouldn't be here now. And maybe we might even have a family. Who am I kidding?"

It had been so long since he had held Sara in his arms. Thats all he wanted to do. He wanted to hold Sara, make love to her and never let her go. She was his world and he would do anything to protect her.

"I'd anything to protect her. I couldn't have her coming back to Vegas and losing everything she had worked for. She always seemed so happy whenever we spoke. If only I had told her I love her sooner."

Sara stood outside the bathroom door, listening to every word that Grissom was saying. Tears started to trickle down her her cheeks, splashing in her shirt.

_'What have I done? He came here to protect me from myself. He remembers what I said word for word. I must of made him feel so guilty, so angry that I shouted at him when he asked me to stop. He's my world too and without him it's incomplete. If only he knew why I wanted him here. I __**need**__ him to hold me, to make love to me. Who am I kidding? He's not happy with me.'_

Her body started to shake, but she stood still, wanting to listen to everything that Grissom had to say.

Racking sobs took over Grissom. He knew he should stay calm, but he just couldn't. He'd hurt his sweetheart again. He couldn't stand it anymore. He wanted to be with his beloved Sara, but if couldn't be with her without hurting her.

Sara heard the sobs from the other side of the door. She felt helpless.

___'I can't bare to see him like this.'_

Sara gave up on swiping away the tears that had been falling, instead she walked straight into the bathroom to find Grissom in a heap on the floor.  


* * *

_**A/N: So, what do think Sara's going to do now she's found Grissom breaking down? What is Griss going to say/do when he finds out Sara heard his every word? Is Sara going to tell Grissom why she needs him so much? Please feel free to let me know your thoughts.  
Hope you enjoyed it and take care.  
Paige**_


	10. Chapter 10

_**A/N: Chapter ten is delivered! Thanks for everyones support. It's what keeps me going. Thanks once more to everyone that has been reading along and sending in your thoughts. I love to read them. If i have not yet replied to your review, I promise you I will very soon. I've had essays coming out of my ears. LOL.  
Enjoy  
****

* * *

  
Chapter ten**_

Sara sat down next to Grissom and pulled him into an embrace. Sara had only ever seen Grissom cry twice before, but nothing compare to what she feeling and seeing. The Grissom in front of her made her go weak at the knees. They had been through so much together, but he had always been the strong.

___'Now it's my turn to take care of you.'__**  
**_

Grissom pulled Sara closer to him as he let the tears flow. He had no idea that Sara had heard what he was saying to himself, let alone that she was thinking pretty much the same thing. He'd always tried to be the strong one, he had never let himself go in front of Sara before.

___'She's too precious to me. I won't let her see me in this state. Not if I can help it anyway,'___

Grissom's tears slowed and his breathing returned to normal when Sara lent her head on his. Grissom rested his head on her shoulder, feeling her slight shudders underneath him.

"Gil?" Sara lifted her head to look at her lover.

"Sara?" Another tear managed to escape it's hold, but it was soon kissed away by Sara.

"Why didn't you tell me Griss?" Sara whispered as she now positioned herself between Grissom's legs.

"I-I uhm I was scared that if you knew you'd leave me for someone younger. God Sara, you deserve someone better than me."

"Oh Gil, You're the only one I could ever had. The love I have for you will never compare to anything else I may feel if I was ever with anyone else." Sara turned 'round and crossed her legs.

"Sara I-"

"Shh." Sara placed a slender finger to lips. "I heard every word you said Gil. Please don't say it again." Sara's eyes filled with tears.

Grissom brought her close to his chest. Sara swung her arms around his neck and cuddled up to him._**  
**_

_What have I done?'_

"Sara? Shall we head back to bed?" Grissom spoke into her hair before planting a kiss on her crown.

"Okay." Sara snuffled.

Grissom attempted to carry her but she refused. Sara didn't want his heart being put under any more stress. Who knew what was around the corner.

******

When the perfect couple got back to bed, they slid under the sheets and snuggled up close.

"Cherry blossom?"

"Yes Gil?" Sara turned onto her stomach, rested her hands on his chest and looked straight into those brilliant blues. Even after nearly twelve years they still held her attention captive.

Grissom looked down into those beautiful browns that matched every inch and curve of her body.

"Would you like a family?" Grissom's gaze moved to somewhere far in the distance.

He was thinking, Sara could tell. "Yes, but, not are the risk of losing you. I happy Gil. Just the two of us." Sara saw Grissom's frown turn into a smile, but it quickly faded.

"I want you to have someone you can love just as much as you do me. Someone who is a part of both of us. Just in case anything ever does happen to me. I-"

"Nothing is going to happen Gil. I'm going to look after you. Even if that means we can't make love any more." Sara dropped her eyes as a single tear slid down her face.

"Shh. I never said that hunni. I just have to take it easy for a little while. Believe me, Sar the only thing I want to do right now is make love to you, but if you don't want to then I can wait. I'm not going anywhere any time soon hunni." Grissom stroked her hair as he spoke to her.

"It's not that I don't want to Griss. It's Just I-I uhm I'm scared of losing you. I'm never going to leave you Gil." Sara kissed Grissom square on the lips. Grissom's hands started to roam her body as he deepened the kiss, allowing her access.

Sara pulled apart and walked to the door. "I'm sorry Gil."  


* * *

_**A/N: What do you guys think is around the corner? Do you want to hear little feet running around? if so boy or girl? What do you think Sara will do next?  
You all know how much I love to hear from you. And remember... you guys are the one's that help decide what happens and how long it goes on for.  
Hope you enjoyed and take care.  
Paige**_


	11. Chapter 11

_**A/N: Sorry for not posting earlier. I had my first GCSE math exam today and have been spending every spare minute I've had studying. So, thanks to everyone that has continued to read along and to those of you that have continued to leave you thoughts and support. It's all very much appreciated.  
Enjoy.  
****

* * *

  
Chapter eleven**_

"Sara, please." Grissom lay on the bed shell shocked and begging.

"No! I don't want to lose you! Not again! And defiantly NOT for good!" Tears started to roll down Sara's cheeks.

She very rarely shouted at anyone, but she had never shouted a Grissom before, not like this anyway. She was feeling so many different things. She knew that if he lay in that bed with him any longer, then she would have given in to her desire to have Grissom. But, then she remembered his heart and she felt hurt ... scared ... lost.

___'Oh God. What would have happened if we went any further. I can't stand to lose him. There'd be no reason for me to live.'_

"Gil. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean-" Sara collapsed to the floor.

Grissom jumped from the bed and ran to Sara's side. He pulled her into his arms as he sat on the floor with her.

"Shh. I'm not going anywhere hunni. I'm sorry." Grissom swept a strand of beautiful brown waves from her face and held her close to his chest.

"See. It's still going strong. It's going to take a hell of a lot more than a faulty heart to get rid of me cherry."_**  
**_

Sara pulled herself away from Grissom and ran into the kitchen. His heart sounded different. It didn't have the strength it used to. It was slower. But nonetheless it still held all the passion and love Grissom had for.

She knew she shouldn't. She hadn't touched a single drop since she got with Grissom.

___'I can't handle this no more! I'm going to lose him forever if I'm not careful. God, I haven't got the energy.'___

Sara came skidding to a halt as she reached the kitchen cupboard. Sara stopped for a moment listening for Grissom's footsteps behind her. She heard nothing so she proceeded to get a glass from the top cupboard and the bottle of red wine she had been saving.

___'If Gil knew ... I don't want to think about it. I don't even want to feel anything let along feel it.'  
___

Grissom stepped silently into the kitchen and watched as Sara poured a large glass of red wine with shaking hands. Tears were still flowing down her face, but not as heavy as before.

___'Please don't Sara. Please. I need you.'___

Grissom silently begged for Sara to stop in her tracks, but she carried on with the task at hand.

Downing her first glass in three brisk gulps, Sara poured herself another glass and turned round to see Grissom stood in the door way. She dropped her eyes to the glass in her hand, took another long drink and headed for the living room.

Her sketches were still laying all over the place and she had to step over them all the get to the couch. Grissom followed, but stopped and stared down at one that had caught his eye.  


* * *

_**A/N: Do you think this is the time for Sara to tell Grissom her secret? Do you want them to fall into each others ams and tell each other how they feel? What do you think the sketch is of that caught Grissom's eye?  
You know what to do! Send me in your thoughts and I'll get back to you all ASAP.  
Thanks once more to each and everyone of you.  
Take care.  
Paige**_


	12. Chapter 12

_**A/N: Here's the next chapter! It's a little longer than the rest so I hope you enjoy. Thanks to everyone who has continued to send their thoughts. I've loved reading every single review that I have received so far. If I haven't yet replied back, then I shall so shortly. I am most thankful to those of you that are spending a few more minutes of your time to tell me what you think.  
Thanks and enjoy.  
****

* * *

  
Chapter twelve**_

"When did you do this one?" Grissom bent down and picked up the drawing that was lay at his feet.

"Oh. A while ago. I think it was one of the first ones I did when I got here." Sara had managed to get her tears under control and was now sat with her feet tucked under her perfectly curved backside.  
Grissom took the seat next to his girlfriend and placed the picture on his lap. Sara looked down at his lap.

_'God Sara. Why did you draw that? You should have known he was going to get upset my it when he saw it.'  
_

"Gil I-I'm sorry. I never meant for you to see that one."

"Why Sara? Why even think about it?! I thought it was in the past?"

His own piercing blue eyes starred up at him, the cold child lay in his arms. Sara was sat on her knees next to him with one hand on his lap and the other holding the lip child's hand. That was the worst day of their lives. They lost their daughter three days after she was born. Sara didn't even get to hold her.

"I lost her and I nearly lost you, Sara." A single tear rolled down his cheek._**  
**_

"I know Griss. It was all I could think about until I drew it. I knew you'd never approve of me drawing it, so I didn't do it until I got here. I needed to know you were safe and that I was able to be weak and break down without you seeing it." Sara sunk to the floor, crossing her legs and resting her head on the edge of the couch.

Grissom let the sketch float to the floor as he threw it out in front of him. "Sara. I've never thought you were weak. God, you're the strongest person I know." Grissom lent forward and brought Sara up into his lap, holding her tight.

Sara clung to his shirt. The tears she thought she had left behind started to fall again. She let the empty wine glass fall to the floor. She pulled herself tighter to Grissom as she heard it smash.

"I don't want to go on like this any more Gil. I ca-called you here because – because I-" Sara couldn't carry on the sentence. She knew she didn't need to, Grissom read her like a book, he always had done.

"Shh. It's going to be okay hunni. I'm here now. We'll get through this together. I'll-"

"You don't even know why I called you in the first place!" Sara was getting angry again. She wanted to so much to calm down, but she couldn't control herself as well after having a glass or two like she used to.

Grissom winced as his lover raised her voice once more. He knew it was the alcohol starting to take over, he also knew he would, in time, find out what had caused her to call him that day.

"Did you call me for the same reason I was going to call you? I needed to know you were okay. I knew you were still talking to Catherine and that she would have told you everything that was going on with me. I didn't want you to break down and me never see you again. As soon as I got off that first shift I was going to call you, but you beat me to it. If you hadn't of called when you did Sara. I would have called you. I would have kept calling and if you didn't pick up I was going to come round here and show you how much I love you, not matter what the doctor had said about my heart. If I had come here with you in the first place I wouldn't even be in this mess."

"I'm with you all the way Gil. And, you don't need to show me how much you love me. If anything I have to prove myself to you. And yes is the answer to your question." Sara's tears had stopped flowing once more and a smile pulled at her mouth.

"You don't need to prove yourself to be me or anyone, Sara. You're perfect. You are all I could wish for and more. It would be nice to have a child, but I'm more than happy with it being just the two of us."

Grissom crashed his lips against Sara's.

Sara parted her lips, allowing Grissom to enter. She drank up every last bit of desire she had for him and him for her. When the pair came up for air, Sara slid of Grissom's lap and started to clean up the broken glass._**  
**_

"Sara, stop. Please." Grissom sat on the edge of the couch and tried to stop Sara before she hurt herself. Her hands were shaking again. She kept dropping pieces and then scrabbling to pick it back up.

When Sara refused to stop, Grissom stood and scooped her into his arms and carried her to the bedroom. As she slipped into a fresh pair of pajamas, Grissom stripped down and slipped between the sheets.

Sara quickly joined him, but instead of snuggling up to him like she used to, she lay on her side of the bed with her back to him as she attempted to cry herself to sleep for yet another night.

Grissom lay on his side and looked over at Sara's back. "Cherry blossom?"

Sara lay still trying to ignore the gorgeous bloke that lay next to her.

"Hey, hunni. You going to tell me what's wrong."

Sara still didn't answer, instead she moved her hands to her stomach and tried so very hard to remember that wonderful feeling of life moving inside her.

"I'm hear for you Sara. Please tell me what's wrong." Grissom spooned himself up to Sara and kissed her lightly on the head.

Sara turned over and snuggled up to Grissom. Grissom wrapped his arms around her letting her know he wasn't going anywhere._**  
**_

"Gil. I miss having a child. I know I was only a mother for three days, but that doesn't matter to me. I miss having someone who is a part of both of us. A constant reminder of the love we have for each other." Sara's silent tears started to become sobs.

Grissom stroked her hair as she spoke. "Sara, why didn't you tell me this before? You knew I would have tried for another child. I still will if that's what you want."

"But, you're not strong enough now. I don't want to risk making love to you and then losing you. You're the best thing that has ever happened to me Gil. You and the baby. I wish I had told Natalie that I was having a baby that night, then maybe she would have let me go and we wouldn't be where we are now."

Sara started to shake, she hadn't thought about that day since she arrived in Frisco. She didn't want to. That maniac was the reason she wasn't in Vegas with a child and husband.

"Sar, that's not just what's been bugging you, is it?"

"No." Sara looked up into those piercing blue eyes and wished she could take him there and then.

"My – My uhm mother killed herself the day be her trial She heard I was here and asked me to see her. I said no and she killed herself the day before I was supposed to stand up in court as a witness to my father's murder. I called a week after I found out. I just can't hold myself together anymore Gil. You saw me earlier, I've gone back to drowning my feelings. All I want to feel is numbness and I'm doing it the only way I know how."

That was it. Sara broke down there and then. Everything she had been keeping in about her mother and the lose of her child almost two years ago, just poured out. She was glad she was in the arms of Grissom. No one else could have made her feel loved. He was the only home she ever had.

Sara curled up in Grissom's arms, her hand once again found it's way to her stomach. Grissom's hand soon joined hers._**  
**_

_'One day Sara I promise we will have a child.'  
_

******

The next morning Grissom awoke to the sound of smashing glass and screaming.

* * *

_**A/N: What do you think is ging on at the Grissom/Sidle beach house? Do you think Grissom has any secrets he is yet to tell Sara, if so what? And, do you think Grissom will react to Sara's confession of missing her child, when she has sobered up? Please let me know what you thought of this chapter, I know many of you have been begging me to get Sara to tell Grissom the reason she called him to come to Frisco.  
Thanks to all of you that answer the above questions. Don't forget, it is you guys that help decide what happens next =O)  
Hope it was what you wanted, and take care.  
Paige.**_


	13. Chapter 13

**_A/N: Here's chapter 13. I really do hope it flows from chapter to chapter, please let me know.  
Thanks to everyone that has continued to read along and leave reviews.  
Enjoy._  


* * *

  
Chapter thirteen**

Grissom jumped out of bed, not bothering with his gown, he ran over to where the screams were coming from.

There, in the corner of the living room, was a hysterical Sara. She was surrounded by broken glass, her hands were bleeding and her face was slick with tears.

"Why?! I did nothing wrong! Why is it always me! I'm not ready for this again.!" Sara slide down the wall and sat on the floor, her feet underneath her.

Grissom walked over to where she was slumped, careful not to stand on any of the broken glass. Her sketches were no longer covering the floor, but instead were on the couch in an untidy pile. The one that had caught Grissom's eye the night before sat on the top.

Dropping down to his knees next to her, he wiped away the tears that were falling and tried to pull her of the twinkling floor.

Sara refused to be moved from her spot on the floor. She started to cry out. She knew Grissom was the one trying to help her but she just wanted to be left alone. So much had happened in such a short period of time. Grissom had come to her, told her he loved him, said he wanted a child and then, above it all, she had told him about her mother. She didn't even want to think about why she had told him about missing her child.

"Leave me alone! I've been so stupid! Go away Gil!" Sara continued to struggle against Grissom, but she was tiring and Grissom easily over powered her.

Scooping her up into his arms, he carried her once more to the bedroom, making sure she wasn't going to move, he went to the bathroom and found the things he needed to clean Sara up.

Sara sat there watching Grissom clean her hands with a gentle touch. He kept asking if it hurt and she just kept shaking her head. Sara had been up hours, she remembered that Grissom was a heavy sleeper, so it was easy for her to go out and drown her sorrows. The pub wasn't a very long walk if she took the beach path. After having drowned her sorrows she walked back, finished of the bottle of red wine, cleaned up the living room, but, by that time she had had it. She broke down. It was the worst break down she had ever had and all she could remember was screaming and then screaming more when the glass smashed against the wall as she threw glass after glass after glass. She needed a way to forget and she couldn't. Not matter how hard she tried, what she tried, she just couldn't do it. She knew Grissom was in the other room so she decided to stop with all the noise, but it was already too late, he was scooping her up into his strong arms and taking her once more to the bedroom. When Grissom disappeared into the bathroom, Sara smiled when she remembered all the time they had made love on the bed she was sat on, but then the thought of her child came back to her and she lay down curling up into a ball. One hand on her stomach once more.

Grissom knew she'd been drinking, he could smell it on her.

"Why Sara?" Grissom finished up what he was doing and sat on the bed with Sara.

Sara just sat there, she didn't want to answer.

Grissom leaned over and took her hand in his. "Please hunni. Maybe if you tell me you might feel a little better."

Grissom had taken his tablets while he was in the bathroom, so he was ready for anything she threw at him.

"Because life isn't worth it!" _'Nice going smartass. Now he will have a heart attack.'_ "Oh God, Gil. I'm so sorry, I didn't meant to shout at you again." Sara pulled herself close to Grissom and he wrapped his arms protectively around her.

"We can always try for another child you know Sar. You don't have to be afraid to lose me. But if I do go, at least I'll go happy." Grissom smiled but Sara was not impressed and gave him a playful slap on the chest.

"Life still wouldn't be worth living."

"Sara! Stop talking like that!" Grissom had never raised his voice at his beloved butterfly before, and now he felt horrible. "I'm sorry hunni. It's just ... I-I worry about you and I-I can't stand uhm you talking like that." Grissomdropped his eyes, his thumb started to caress the back of Sara's hand.

"I'm sorry Gil." More tears started to fall down her cheeks,

Grissom leaned over and kissed each one as they fell.

Needing to taste him, Sara tilted her head and crashed her lips against his. She had no idea what she was doing.

She'd obviously had too much to drink and that pill she put in her first drink the night before really hadn't helped matters.

Grissom didn't question Sara's actions, he just followed her, even though his head was telling him to stop because it was just the alcohol speaking, but his heart knew better. She had wanted this since he set foot in that beach house, but she was too frightened to do anything about it because of his old ticker.

His hands roamed those beautiful curves he knew all too well.

Sara kept her fingers wrapped in Grissom silky locks.

As Grissom move his hand up Sara's back and slipped under her top, she moaned and pulled back.

"Gil."

"Sar." Grissom didn't waste any time. "Would you care to make love?"

"I would love to." Sara's words were slurred. She wasn't thinking straight.

_'Did I just say yes to Grissom. But, he has a bad heart, he shouldn't be doing this.'_

"Mmm." Sara was enjoying it too much to get him to stop.

******

The next day Sara awoke to find herself laying in bed, in the the nude with a naked Grissom.  


* * *

_**A/N: What do you think Sara's reaction is going to be when she realises she's made love to Grissom? Is Grissom okay and what is he going to say/do? Please let me know, I love to hear from you.  
Hope you enjoyed it. If it's confusing please let me know and I'll get back to you.  
Take care.  
Paige**_


	14. Chapter 14

**_A/N: Sorry it's taken me so long to get this one up, it's taken me a while to write. Thanks to everyone that has continued to read along and leave your thoughts. I've loved everyone.  
Enjoy._  
****

* * *

  
Chapter fourteen**

_'Oh God. Please be okay, Gil.'_

Sara planted a kiss on Grissom's cheek to let him know she was awake.

Grissom woke up and tried to move, but he felt a weight on his chest and then he remembered the activities of the night just gone. With a goofy grin on his face Grissom turned to Sara and said,

"Good morning, Cherry Blossom."

"Morning Bugman."

Sara looked up at her man and was silently relieved that he was still with her. "Have a good night?"

"Why yes. Did you?" Grissom ran his hand through her hair as she rested her head on his chest once more.  
Sara thought about her answer.

"Sar?"

"Yes. I had a good night Gil." Sara's hands started to shake again, but she tried to hide it the best she could.

"Are you okay, hunni?" Grissom pulled Sara closer to him and held her hand. He felt it shaking and held it tighter.

"I'm fine." Sara slide from between the sheets, threw on her gown and headed straight for th study.

Grissom quickly did the same and followed her. _'I've never seen her this bad before. Have I done something wrong? _

_'Oh God, she's worried about my heart.'  
_

******  
Sara stood in the far corner of the room, starring out over the sea as the sun rose higher into the sky. She looked down at her hands which were still shaking even though she was still trying to hide.

Grissom walked into the study, with a slight limp. He had stopped to take his medication before coming into the room. It was the only room he hadn't seen when he was here the last time.

It was small with a large glass door and a balcony on one side, a large window on the other, a single desk that held papers and a laptop, a single chair was sat underneath it. The floor was wooden just like all the other rooms, other than the bedroom of course.

Grissom wrapped his arms around Sara's waist and held her close.

They stood there for a few minutes in silence, watching the people below run around.

Sara was the first to speak, "I wanted to say no last night Gil. But, I've missed you so much, ever since you stepped foot through that door I've wanted make love. I'm so sorry if I hurt you last night, I don't know what I was thinking."

Sara turned around and put her palms flat on Grissom's chest, her fingers dancing along the edge of his gown.

"How could you think that you'd ever be able to hurt me. I was the one that asked you to make love Sara, not the other way around. if you had wanted me to stop, I would have, you know that."

"I know."

"If anyone should be sorry, it's me, cherry. I know how much you're worrying about me. I should never of asked in the first place." Grissom lower his eyes from the window to the woman in his arms. "I love you."

"If I'm pregnant Gilbert Grissom, I'm going to kill you." Sara slapped him on the chest and flung her arms around his neck.  
"But wouldn't that mean we'd get a little baby daughter to take care of?" Grissom held her tight as he brought up the subject of children, Sara always had been sensitive to the subject.

"I don't think I'm over losing out first daughter, Gil." Sara held Grissom tight as she thought back to that day. "But I **do** want to be a mother at some point in my life Gil."

"Good. Because we didn't, you know ... uhm use like -"

"Gil, shh, I know. And if I'm pregnant I'll live with it. **If** I'm pregnant Gil. I'd love to feel life growing inside me again."

"We'll have to wait and see then."

"What do you want to do today Gil." Sara stopped hugging Grissom and gave him a passionate kiss.

"What do **you** want to do?" Grissom responded when they came up for air, before beginning his own assault on her mouth.  


* * *

_**A/N: So, what sort of thing do you guys what our favorite couple to do (other than love making)? And what do you think is going on with Sara and her shaky hands and alcohol? Please send your thoughts in. Hope you've enjoyed this chapter.  
Take care.  
Paige**_


	15. Chapter 15

**_A/N: Sorry it's taken me so long to get this next chapter up. Thanks to everyone that has continued to read along and leave your thoughts. Enjoy._  


* * *

  
Chapter fifteen**

"Lets go to the park. I've been so involved with work since I moved back here, I haven't had time to relax." Sara continued to plan with the front of Grissom's gown as she starred up at the handsome man.

"Your wish is my command. Would you like a picnic with that my love?" Grissom leaned forward and crashed his lips to hers.

"As long as we can have dessert." Sara grinned and pulled herself closer to Grissom (if that was possible).

"Of course we can." Grissom smiled his goofy grin and pulled Sara into the kitchen. "But first, lets have a shower, get dressed and clean up the living room."

"Okay." Sara squeezed Grissom's hand and led him to the bathroom.

******

In the shower, Grissom had started to wash Sara's hair when she turned 'round and pulled herself to Grissom. He immediately responded and crashed his lips onto hers. Sara leaned her hips forward and could feel his manhood pressing slightly on her lower stomach.

"Sara." Grissom moaned into Sara's mouth as she began her assault again.

"Gil?" By the time the pair came up for air for the second time, the water had turned cold.

"Shall we save this 'till later?" Grissom pulled Sara out of the shower and held her tight as he dried her down.

"Okay. I just don't want to hurt you." Sara helped Grissom dry himself. He was wincing from the pain in his knee again. "Gil are u-"

"I'm fine Sara." Grissom flung on his gown and helped Sara into hers before walking out to he bedroom.

"Gil, stop." Sara stop still, but continued to hold his hand, forcing him to stop in his tracks. "Your knee. Are you sure you're okay?"

"It's nothing a little rest won't cure." Grissom tugged lightly on Sara's hand. He wanted to go and lie down with his beloved butterfly.

"Gil talk to me." Sara followed Grissom and sat in the edge of the bed with him.

"I'm scared Sara. I've only ever been this scared twice before." Tears started to silently roll down his cheeks, but Sara wiped them away before he could protest. "I never want to leave you."

"Then I'm moving back to Ve-"

"No! Sara you've built a life here. I don't want to go back if my world is here." Grissom pulled Sara onto his lap and looked longingly into her eyes.

"But -"

"No buts hun. I'm leaving Catherine in charge and I'm coming to teach here, with you."

"Gil I-I"

"Shh. I don't need the stress of the lab." Grissom put his hand on her thigh and squeezed.

"We better get ready for our trip to the park before we do something we're going to regret." Sara stood and headed for the wardrobe, throwing jeans and a tank top out. While Grissom went to his case and pulled out the first set of clothing he could find.

******

15 minutes later Grissom and Sara were on their hand and knees cleaning up the mess from the previous night and that morning.

"Good job the floor's wooden." Grissom chuckled as he wiped up a small amount of red wine that had been spilled earlier on.

"That's why I got wood." Sara giggled as she came and stood over Grissom. "Ready for that picnic?"  


* * *

  
_**A/N: So, what do you think is going to happen at the park? What do think Sara is going to say when Grissom brings up the guys from the lab?  
Please feel free to send in your thoughts.  
Take care.  
Paige**_


	16. Chapter 16

**_A/N: Sorry it's been so long since my last up-date. Great thanks goes to everyone that has continued to read along and leave their thoughts thanks! I love to read what you all think.  
Enjoy._  


* * *

  
Chapter sixteen**

Forty-five minutes later Grissom and Sara were sat on the blanket they had packed. Sara was snuggled up into Grissom's arms and pulled herself close.

"I wish you'd come here sooner, Gil." Sara looked out across the park and watched as a family arrived and started to play kickball.

"So do I Sar." Grissom followed Sara's gaze as he felt her grip on his shirt tighten.

One of the children that had just arrived with her brothers and parents was in a wheel chair, she was sat on the side lines watching as her family played in front of her. Her gaze met Sara's and she smiled slightly at her. Sara smiled back and looked up at Grissom.

"We could have been that family." Sara looked away from the girl and Gil as tears started to roll down her cheeks.

"Shh. It's okay sweetie. I think it was a bad idea for us to come." Grissom pulled Sara closer to his chest as her body started to shake. "Do you want to go home?"

"No. I need to stay, Gil. Please."

"Okay. Would you like to talk?" Grissom rested his head on his lovers as he felt his chest tighten.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah." Grissom pulled himself and smiled down at his cherry blossom.

"Here." Sara got his pills out of her bag and handed him one along with a bottle of water.

Grissom took them and looked straight into Sara's worried face. "I'm good. I must have forgotten to take them before we left."

"It's a good job I'm here then. I don't want you dropping dead on me just yet Gilbert Grissom." Sara stood and embraced Grissom. His strong arms held her close. She could feel the heat of him causing her to grow slightly sticky. Sara pulled Grissom lightly down with her and the couple sat their in each others laps in silence for a little while before the tears started to fall again, this time from Grissom.

"Griss?" Sara turned in Grissom's lap so she could see those ocean blues.

"I'm good Sar. I was just thinking about what we were like back in Vegas."

"I don't want to think about it." Sara caressed Grissom's cheek, hoping he would concentrate on what was happening now.

"Remember the DUI? I drove you home that night. It was the first time we kissed. And that time when I stormed out of that crime scene because i was getting angry. You followed and said that I had chalk on my cheek. That was the first time we ever touched at work,"

"I remember Gil. I also remember the night before Natalie got to me, to us. Wasn't that the first time we made love?" Sara smiled her infamous Sidle smile at the thought of that night. She got Grissom's geeky grin in return.

"I remember. We were so nervous." Grissom laughed. It had been so long since he enjoyed himself like this, just sat here talking.

Sara too remembered what they were like and laughed, causing Grissom to crash his lips down onto hers.

The family that had caught Sara's eye when they first left started to leave. Sara and Grissom watched them as the little laughed and joked with her siblings as they made their way across the green grass.

"What would we be like now, Gil? If our daughter had survived, what would she be like? Would she enjoying doing the things we do, or would she be in a chair and hate going out? I would love to know."

"I would too. You know, I could always pull a few favors from the lab, send them over a copy of one of the photos we've got and have Archie work his magic."

"But Gil. he'd have to put her in a wheel chair. None of the guys know how ill she truly was. N-"

"Catherine does Sar. I had to tell her. When you left she was the only one I would talk to because I know she was in touch with you. She used to come and ask me if she should tell you how I was really feeling. I always told her no, but you found out anyway." Grissom pulled Sara into an embrace when he saw how hurt she was when he mentioned the others.

"I know." Sara broke down into a heap of tears. She pulled herself closer to Grissom, his heart was beating strong. It made her smile slightly to hear it.

"Cherry, there's something I ne-"

"Let's do it Gil. Let's get Archie to work his magic. We'll have it done for her birthday." Sara whipped her eyes dry and looked back over towards the park where the children where starting to disperse.

"Please, cherry blossom. I need to tell you something about last night." Grissom pushed Sara to arms length so that he could see her, all of her.  


* * *

_**A/N: What is it do you think Grissom is going to tell Sara? And how do you think she's going to react? Is it time for the guys from the lab to show up? You tell me!  
Please hit the green button and send in your thoughts.  
Thanks and take care.  
Paige  
**_


	17. Chapter 17

**_A/N: Here's today's chapter. Thanks for all of you that left a review. If I haven't yet replied then I will do shortly. Thanks once more and enjoy._  


* * *

  
Chapter seventeen**

"How could you Gil?!" Sara stood and stormed off.

"Sara! Please!" Grissom scooped up the blanket and basket and ran after Sara who was already half way to the SUV.

" Sara!"

_'God, I'm so not built for this anymore.'_

Sara got in the drivers side of the SUV and started the engine, she was about to drive when she saw Grissom limping towards her, struggling for breath and carrying what she had left behind. She waited for him to get in before asking, "Why on _earth_ did you do that Gil?"

"Do what?" Gil asked a little breathless.

"Run!"

"I couldn't let you get away, not again." Grissom went to hold Sara's hand, but she pulled it away and stepped on the gas pedal.

******

Sara stormed straight into her study and slammed to door shut after helping Grissom bring everything in from the car.

Grissom dropped himself on the couch, he had completely forgotten about his pills and drifted off to sleep.

Meanwhile, in the study Sara was sat at her desk sketching yet another drawing of her and Grissom, this time of them at the park. She know she shouldn't be angry with Gil, but he had ignored his heart last night. He made love to her even though his bod was telling him to stop. Sara stopped drawing and threw her pencil at the wall and screamed, "That stupid bastard! Why?! Why did he do it!?" Sara slammed her fists against the thick wood like she had done many times before when she thought of Grissom.

Grissom didn't hear Sara's screams as she broke down in the other room as he was already in too deep a sleep to hear anything that was going on around him. He was dreaming of Sara and their precious daughter. Yes, he'd grieved, but still wished she was with them, and now they were going to get Archie to do a picture of what she would look like now, for her third birthday.

_He was running around as she sped around in her chair, but she stopped, coughing. Grissom gave her oxygen and sat with her in the park until the fit eased and they were able to make their way home. Sara didn't want him to take their daughter out, but the weather was perfect and his butterfly had begged and begged to go to the park. It was the day before her seventh birthday and Grissom had retired from the lab five years ago. He lived with Sara and Vanessa at the townhouse in Vegas. They had never left. Sara was still working at the lab and often had to pull double as Ecklie was __**still**__ having trouble finding the right person. When they arrived back at the house, Vanessa feel asleep in her chair with her sketching pad on her lap. She loved to draw, just like her mother. She was drawing her mother and father sat out on the beach. She never drew herself._

"Hello."

"Hi, it's my husband, he's not responding to me. He has a heart condition. Las Vegas. Thank you."

Sara hung up the phone and headed back to Grissom. She held his hand and kept trying to wake him up, nothing was working.

"Gil please. I need you to be alright."

_'For goodness sake Gil! I know you're a deep sleeper but not this deep. Come one!'_

The ambulance arrive and rushed Grissom off, there wasn't enough room with Grissom and the paramedics, so she packed a bag and followed behind in her SUV.  


* * *

_**A/N: So, what does everyone think is going to happen to Grissom? Which member of the team do you think is going to show up first? What does Sara do? I always love to hear from you all!!  
Take care.  
Paige  
**_


	18. Chapter 18

**_A/N: Here's the next chapter for you all! Thanks for the great reviews and suggestions. I do hope you're enjoying it!  
Enjoy._  


* * *

  
Chapter eighteen**

Sara had been in the waiting room for an hour when Catherine called. She had completely forgotten about telling the guys in Vegas.

"Hi Cath."

"Hey Sar. You okay?"

"No. It's Gil. He was asleep on the couch, next thing I know he's slipped into a coma." Tears flooded from Sara.

"Shh. I'm coming over Sar. I'll be there soon, I promise."

"Tell the guys, just please, I'm begging Cat, don't bring anyone else." Sara managed to get out her request before another burst of tears overcame her.

"I promise, hang in there Sar."

"I'll try." And she would, for Grissom. Sara flipped her phone shut just as the doctor came into the room after evaluating Grissom.

"Mrs. Grissom?" Doctor Saul came into the room, her shoulder length black hair bobbed as she walked.

"Yes?" Sara stood and approached the tall woman. She towered above Sara, and that was hard to do as Sara was 5' 6".

"I'm Dr. Saul. Your husband is doing great. We have concluded that he has no brain damage and that his heart is under no extra stress. I do have some bad news though. We don't seem to know why Mr. Grissom has slipped into this coma or when or if he's going to come out of it." The doctors pager went off. "I'll send a nurse in to take you to him." She left in one swift motion.

Five minutes later, a short, stocky nurse came in and took Sara to the private room where Grissom would be staying.

******

Catherine arrived six hours later to find Sara asleep in the chair next to Grissom, holding his hand.

"Sara." Catherine whispered as she approached the slumbering friend.

Sara sat up with a start, not letting go of Grissom. She looked over to Catherine and gave her a weak smile. "Hi, Cath."

"How you holdin' up?"

"I'm doing okay." Sara stole a look at Grissom before rising and embraced Catherine as the tears started to pour once more, as she got up and embraced her best friend.

"Shh. He's going to pull through. He's a fighter." Catherine held her friend as she cried into her shoulder.

******

_Once again Grissom was with his daughter. Sara wasn't there, she had been called into work. He didn't ask for details. He didn't want to know. She was spending more and more time at the lab and near-on no time with him or Vanessa. Grissom tucked his daughter in and headed for bed, alone once more.  
_Grissom felt Sara kiss each of his fingers, just like he had done with her when she was in the hospital. He tried to move his fingers, but his body was not co-operating with his mind and heart.

_'Come on Gil. Wake up! She needs you! Stop laying around and bloody wake up to your Cherry Blossom!!"  


* * *

**A/N: So, do you think Gil is going to wake up? What do you think Catherine and/or Sara is going to say IF he does? Loving the reviews I've had in so far.  
Take care.  
Paige**  
_


	19. Chapter 19

_**A/N: I'm sorry for not posting for a while, I've just been a little snowed under. Anyway, thanks to everyone that has continued to read and review. I've loved reading all of your thoughts. I hope you all continue to hit the little green button when you're done**_.  
_**Enjoy!**_

* * *

Chapter nineteen

Four days later and Sara still hadn't left Grissom's side. Catherine had settled well into Sara's beach house (not that she was there very often). Sara has tried to sleep, but she couldn't without having those strong arms close around her.

"Please Grissom." Sara pleaded with her angel to wake up. Her tears splashed down onto his hand and he stirred.

"That's it! Gil! Gil! Come on, wake up!"  
Grissom squeezed Sara's hand. His eyes fluttered open and then shut almost as quick as he opened them.

The doctors and nurses spilled in, pushing Sara to the side line. Catherine ran in and cradled Sara as she start to cry and shout at the physicians that were messing with the tubes and wires that were connected to Grissom.

"What are you doing?!" Sara clung onto Catherine for support as her knees went weak.

"Please don't worry Mrs. Grissom, we're just checking his vitals and taking him off the ventilator." One of the nurses had turned around and grasped Sara my the hand before turning back to attend to Gil.

"It's okay Sara." Catherine cooed as Sara slid to the floor.  
Sara slumped even further into Catherine as the doctors and nurses left them alone half an hour later.

******

It was another two hours before Grissom fully awoke. Sara was curled up in the chair watching her beloved as tears rolled down her cheeks.

Catherine was slumped in the corner chair fast asleep.

Grissom didn't care Catherine was there. He looked over to Sara and motioned for her to come closer. She did as she was told and sat on the edge of the bed, holding his hand in hers.

After refusing help from the Sara, Grissom sat up and pulled her into an embrace whispering in her ear, "I'll always be here for you."

"I thought I lost you." Sara rested her head on Grissom's shoulder, closed her eyes and drifted into a restless slumber.

Grissom watched as Sara slept in his arms.

_'What have I done to her? She's lost weight. She's not sleeping. I'm hurting her again. I should never had come. She was happier without me. Without knowing about my heart.'  
_

Just as Grissom too was drifting of to sleep, Catherine awoke and smiled at the couple snuggled up on the bed. She silently walked over to the other side of the room, grabbed the blanket Sara had brought with her and draped it over them.

"Hi Cath." Grissom opened his eyes to the strawberry blonde that was now stood at the foot of the bed.

"Hey Griss. How you feeling?"

"Better. How's Sara been?" The worry and sadness that flashed in Grissom's eyes were mirrored in Catherine's emerald greens.

"She's getting there Gil. She's just glad you're still with us." Catherine smiled, started to stride silently once more to the door, but stopped, turned back to look at Grissom and Sara. "Look after her Gil. She's really needs you at the moment."

"I promise Cath."

"I'll be in later." Catherine twinkled at Grissom and walked out the room, leaving Sara and Grissom in peace. At least, until the guys arrived.

* * *

_**A/N: So, what do think Sara and Grissom will say/do when the gang arrives? Do you want Sara to tell Grissom she's pregnant and how?  
I hope you enjoyed it!! Can't wait to here what you all think.  
Take care.  
Paige  
**_


	20. Chapter 20

**_A/N: I'm sorry it's taken me forever to post this chapter, but, it's here! Great thanks to everyone that has continued to read along and and even more thanks to those of you that are leaving reviews. I have really enjoy reading them, thank you.  
Enjoy!_  
****

* * *

  
Chapter Twenty**

A week later Grissom was allowed out of the hospital and was now curled up in the bedroom while Sara worked down in the kitchen on the vegetable soup Grissom had taught her to make.

Down in the kitchen Sara was busily chopping the vegetables and making coups of fresh juice. As the timer on the stove rang through the beach house, she started to hum to herself as she added the stockings and vegetables to the already boiling water.

Running into the living room to answer the ringing phone, Sara discarded Grissom's 'Bugs life' cooking apron on the back of the couch and answered in a irritated tone.

"Sidle." Sara carried the phone into the kitchen and continued to stir the soup.

"Wow Sara, no need to sound be so snappy." Jim Brass chimed from the other end of the line.

"Sorry Brass. How are you?"

"I was gonna ask you the same thing."

"I'm fine."

"I know you too well Ms. Sidle to know that isn't true. Where's Griss?"

"He's resting. Don't know where Catherine's gone though, haven't seen her for a while."

"She's just called me. She's been with a couple of relatives that live on the edge of Frisco."

'_God. I hate to lie to her.'_

"Oh." Sara was disappointed that Catherine hadn't told her.

'_I could really use a friend.'_

A pager went off at Brass's end. "Sorry kiddo. I've got a case. Take care of yourself."

"Promise. Bye Jim." Sara put the phone back on it's cradle, dished out the soup and carried it upstairs to the patiently waiting Grissom.

After dinner Grissom and Sara were snuggled on the couch watching some cheesy movie that was on.

"Gil?"

"Mmm."

Sara lifted her head off Grissom chest slightly so she could look up into his brilliant blue eyes. "I'm sorry."

"What for Sar?"

"For not telling you sooner."

"Tell me what, cherry?"

"I'm pregnant, Gil." A couple of tears managed to escape Sara's grasp.

"Sara, hunni, that's great."Grissom entwined his fingers with hers and rested both their hands on her stomach.

"Really?"

"Yes." Grissom made small circles around Sara's belly button with his thumb, but never taking his eyes of his beautiful cherry blossom.  


* * *

_**A/N: I hoped you enjoyed this chapter, and here's this week's question; What do you think Sara is going to have? Can't wait to here what you all have to say.  
Take care.  
Paige  
**_


	21. Chapter 21

**_A/N: Thanks to everyone that has continued to read along and also to those that have sent in reviews, they've been great to read over the week.  
So, happy new year to you all and enjoy!_  
****

* * *

  
Chapter Twenty-One**

At noon the next day, while Grissom and Sara were washing the dishes after having an early dinner, there was a knock on the front door.

The pair went over after trying to ignore the knock several times . Looking through the peep hole Sara saw Catherine stood there with her back to the door telling someone to hush.

When Sara opened the door Catherine moved to the side and the guys from the lab came from around the back of Catherine's SUV. Sara screamed and ran up to them, giving them all hugs, starting with Brass, then Nick, Warrick and Greg.

Catherine stood with Grissom on the door step and watched as Sara and the gang caught up out on the sandy beach.

"She seems happy."

"She is Catherine. Very." Grissom walked over to Sara and wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her close. Resting his hands on her stomach once more. This just caused the already wide grins that the guys were showing to grow even wider.

"I still can't believe your all here."

"Better start believing Sar."

******

An hour later Sara and Grissom were lay on the beach in their swim wear while the rest of the guys were playing in the sand and water, building a sand castle.

"I love it when you smile like this and don't stop." Grissom was flashing her his boyish grin when Catherine and Brass came and joined the love sick couple on the blanket.

"So Catherine. Did you enjoy staying with your relatives?" Sara snuggled her back into Grissom as she question Catherine.

Catherine desperately looked over at Jim. "Uh – Yeah." That was all Catherine could manage.

"What was the case about Jim?" Sara arched her eye brow, just like the way Grissom did when he knew something was going on.

"It was a domestic. Nothing special." Brass stole a look at Catherine who shook her head.

"What was that for Cath?" This time it was Grissom who was asking the questions.

"Nothing."

"Hey Sar! Please tell me that the food on this side of Frisco is better than the stuff they serve in the hotel on the other side." Greg had decided he'd had enough of the water and wanted to pig out. A few seconds later Nick and Warrick joined Guys in the conversation about food.

"What do you mean Greggo?"

"I blew it didn't I?"

"Blew what?" Sara was staring straight at Catherine and Jim. "You've all been here since Catherine flew over when i called her about Gil."

"A few days after Cath called us to say you could need cheering up. We wanted to surprise you at the hospital, but when we got there you were really upset so we left you alone." Warrick explained and looked down at his feet, as if he'd just been sent to the principals' office.

"I called to see if you were both home. When we knew you were we came straight over." Brass too looked down a his feet.

"It was all my idea." Catherine joined the guys in looking at her feet.

But, when Sara and Grissom started to laugh and smile, Nick chimed, "Are we off the hook?"

"You were never on it Nicky." Sara stood and hugged each of the guys and said, "Who fancies Pizza?!"

"Yes!" They all shouted together.

"Good. 'Cause I'm starving!" Sara walked over to Grissom who was now standing less than a foot away.

"Take the guys to the beach house and call the pizza guy, Sara and I will be up in a sec. Oh, and the number's on the fridge" Grissom called over his shoulder as he and Sara started to stroll down the beach line.  


* * *

_**A/N: So what do you guys think of this chapter? Do you think the guys have figured it out yet? I love to hear from you all once more.  
Hope you enjoyed and take care.  
Paige**_


	22. Chapter 22

**_A/N: I'm soo sorry for it taking like forever to get this to you guys. I've been really snowed under with school work. I also apologise for it being so short. And if it gets confusing it will all be explained in the next chapter.  
Great, great thanks to everyone who is continuing to read along and leave reviews (they are what keeps me writing).  
Enjoy._  
****

* * *

Chapter Twenty-Two**

"Are you okay Sara?"

"I'm fine."

"You sure?"

"Yes Gil. I'm glad the guys are here and that I don't have to worry about them knowing about us."

"Do you want to tell them about the baby?"

"I dunno Gil." Sara looked down at feet as the water lapped at them.

"They're going to want to know hun."

"I know. I just want to keep it to ourselves a little while longer."

"If you wish."

"I wish." The pair stopped about half an hour away from the beach house and turned to each other.

Grissom pulled Sara close and gazed lovingly into her brilliant drown eyes before crashing his lips to hers. When the need for air drew the couple apart, Sara turned 'round so her back was against Grissom and pulled his hands to rest on her slight bump.

"We'd better get back to the house before Jim and Catherine send a search party."

Grissom and Sara shared a good laugh as they headed back up to the beach house hand in hand.

******  
Catherine was sat in the living room to the beach house chatting with the guys about what had been going on in Vegas since she they had all been together in Frisco.

"I can't believe that Ecklie dusted off his kit." Catherine giggled as Greg and Nick finished telling the story of the staff meeting the day before they came over to join her, Sara and Grissom.

"I know. Last time he had his kit out was before Grissom became the supervisor." Brass joined in the conversation after coming back from his thoughts.

"Yeah. That was when? My first year?" Catherine had had more than her fair share of alcohol in the past half hour, if not longer.

"That was the year before Cath." Warrick pulled Catherine onto his lap as Brass pried away her fourth beer.

"Anyway guys, where do you think Griss and Sara have got to?" Nick stood by one of the front windows and looked out on the beach.

All of five minutes later, Sara and Grissom walked into the living room, Grissom's arm was still snaked around Sara's waist and Sara was leaning comfortably back into him.

Sara's eyes twinkled when she looked at her family sat in front of her. A few half drunk.

"Sara and I have some news to tell you."

"You're getting married!" Catherine chirped from Warrick's lap in the far corner.

"Sorry Cath." Sara giggled.

"Sara's having a baby." Grissom was calm, while Sara shuck slightly in Grissom's arms waiting for the response of the silent room.  


* * *

_**A/N: So, what do you think the guys are going to do/say? And what will Sara say to Grissom for telling everyone? Can't wait to hear your views!  
Take care.  
Paige  
**_


	23. Chapter 23

**_A/N: Sorry for taking forever to update. Great thanks for everyone who has continued to read and send their thoughts. It's what keeps me writing._****  
****_So enjoy!_  
****

* * *

Chapter twenty-three**

The silence of the room had gotten too much, Sara let go of Grissom, turned on her heel and headed for the stairs, pushing Brass out the way as he tried to stop her.

"Now look what you've gone and down superman." Greg was still sat in his chair next to the window, silently watching from the sidelines, so not to say the wrong thing and upset Grissom, or worse ... Sara.

"How many beers have you had Greg?" Grissom looked over at Greg before shaking his head and heading after Sara at almost a jog.

"None." Greg said with a proud smile plastered on his face.  
******

Sara knew that Grissom would soon be following her, so she threw open the door to her study, causing it to slam against the door and then back into place behind her.

Once Sara was out on the balcony she allowed the tears to flow and the anger to boil to the surface.

_'Please Gil. Don't hurt me any more.' _ Sara silently begged as she heard his heavy footsteps descending the landing to her door. _'He better not dare...'_

Grissom halted outside Sara's study, not knowing whether to invade her privacy or to leave her to it. He knew this was the only room which she could use to escape from the world around her. 'Sara's Quiet Room' he called it.

Deciding it best to leave her, he sat against the wall outside the door and awaited his love to let him know when she was ready to talk.

Grissom stayed where he was, unmoving, for a hour before he headed downstairs to usher everyone out.

Sara listened to his footsteps as they grew softer as he descended the stairs. Then there was a load of noise and a final slamming on the door. Sara took the opportunity to go to the master bedroom and lie down. She knew that would be the first place Grissom went before going to her study.

******

Grissom lent his head against the front door after he had slammed it shut after a _very_ drunk Catherine, whom was being carried by Warrick. Greg, who was still sober, was driving the rest of the team back to the hotel on the other side of Frisco, in Brass' SUV.

_God Sara, what have I done?_

Grissom headed back up the stairs and went to their bedroom to get changed before he would go and check on Sara. But when he reached the door, he heared Sara's sobs echoing through the door.

Grissom stepped into the room and sat on the edge of the bed.

"Sara?" His voice was soft and sad. He knew he was the one that had done this to her. He hated seeing her like this.

"Go away Gil."

"Please Sara. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said what I did. I was stupid. I didn't mean to hurt you, I – I don't know what I was thinking." Gil looked down at his feet, his hands remained in his lap as Sara recoiled when he went to brush away her tears.

Sara didn't know what to say, so she stayed silent and hoped that he would leave her to her Grissom didn't leave after five minutes, Sara took all the courage she had left, turned over to face him, but what she saw made her feel guilty for pushing him away. It made her tears flow even more.  


* * *

_**A/N: What do you think Sara has seen? Thanks to everyone who is still reading along. All your thoughts and suggestions are most welcome!  
Thank you all once again for sticking with this.  
Take care.**_


	24. Chapter 24

**_A/N: Once again sorry for the short chapter. Thanks to everyone who is reading along and sending in their thoughts and suggestions. I hope you enjoy this chapter!_  
****

* * *

Chapter twenty-four**

Grissom had slumped to the floor, his head in his hands as he allowed the tears he had been holding back to flow.

Sara moved to kneel next to him as they both cried. Sara was afraid to touch him in fear that he would push her away, like she had just done to him. She knew it wasn't good for her to upset him. His heart could only take so much more.

Once the tears had slowed down a little, Sara found her voice and nervously put forward her apology to Grissom. "Gil, I – I'm so sorry. I overacted. I know your excited about becoming a father and I understand – I really do. I just wasn't ready to tell the guys yet. I was looking forward to us enjoying something, just me and you, without the guys butting every five minutes."

Gil lifted his head slightly and looked at Sara. "I forgive you Sara, but it is not entirely you fault. I should have listened to you when you said that you didn't want the guys to know. I got carried away with myself. Forgive me." Grissom hanged his low, refusing to look into Sara's beautiful chocolate eyes, scared of what he might see.

"Of course I forgive you Gil. How could I not. I love you." Sara lifted his head and softly kissed his lips. She made the kiss linger as she waited for him to respond. When he didn't, she looked up to find the tears flowing once more. "Let's head to bed Grissom." Sara held his arm and helped him up to the bed.

Grissom allowed Sara to pull him to the bed. When clothes had been striped, Grissom spooned himself to Sara and held her tight. As his hand brushed lightly over her slightly larger breasts, his arousal caused his to shift slightly, eliciting a moan from Sara.

Sara turned over and started and crashed her lips to Grissoms'. He immediately deepened the kiss and started to let his hands roam.

As Grissom pleasured her with his hands and fingers, Sara held on tight to the bed sheets as she came closer and closer to the edge.

Sara was soon pleading with Grissom to enter her when she could take no more. Sara met every thrust with a cry of pleasure until she went over the edge and screamed her lovers' name.

Gil soon followed Sara and collapsed to the side of her.

Sara rested her head on Grissoms' chest and waited for them to both catch their breath before handing Grissom his pills. She didn't want to hurt him, and that was what scared her the most. She was always worrying about Grissom doing too much, even in bed, when she seemed to lose the ability to say anything but his name.

* * *

_**A/N: What do you think of this chapter? Only two, maybe three chapters left to this fic. Thanks for reading along.  
Take care!**_


End file.
